Friday, October 28, 2011

part of a club no one talks about

There has got to be some crazy statistic that states 3 out of your 5 best friends are currently popping pills for some type of emotional unrest or wondering if someone else feels like they do, right? At least that is what I tell myself to feel better…and not feel alone. I didn’t think depression and anxiety would be a part of my daily vocabulary in my late twenties. In fact I didn’t think I would be medicated for it or spend my hard-earned money on counseling and psychiatry visits. I wasn’t prepared to work the hardest I had ever worked before to only move two steps forward and five back. I questioned myself and my faith until I came to the end of me and then I would start the process all over again the next day. If this sounds depressing, well it is, you’re right. (It’s called depression) But there’s a glimmer in there too. That’s the thing about trials and God. You are never left the same. Most of the time you come out on the other end changed, and for the better is what they tell me. I’m still hoping for this glimmer.

Someone really wise recently told me that if God never takes away my anxiety then I would have to figure out a way to carry my suffering for His glory. To change the way I viewed it and praise God anyway. So this is it. My vulnerability, my blog, and my praise in the midst of pain. I pray you find solace in knowing you are not alone, that some days are hard and that’s ok, and that laughter helps too.

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